Limited & Forever

“Yeah, you say them out loud Those words

They never go away

They live on, even when we’re gone”

Today, HangZhou is still cold.I hope Da Nang get warmer, because my Nhung’s body is so weak…And wearing little clothes. Maybe you can wear what I bought for you? Now I wore that clothes, and it makes me feel warmer.Da Nang’s temperature is not cold like HangZhou, so that clothes can keep my love warm.

I am trying to learn Vietnamese, finding the book, like Tiếng Việt 123.I think I am not stupid, so if I spend time to learn something, I can make it.

I always imagine talking with Nhung’s parents and Tỉn. It makes me feel so happy.And I know, if I can speak Vietnamese, they will be happy too.So why not?

Now I have many goals to chase, and my heart is calm down and peaceful. So I should keep my steps one by one, love my wife, achieve those goals~

Watch me, Nhung, I will show you my love.

Đà nẵng buồn

Today i feel so cold. My clothes make me so cold… Danang have rain..  I buy one cup milk tea,  listen music and see rain..  

My mom and dad worry about me,  but i say i fine.  My heart feel miss and peaceful.  See my flowers , start learning Chinese 🎉🎉 .. I find one page teach Chinese,  i can speak it,  but writing it so difficult..  I will try my best.  I know i can do it.  

Look at the time.  I know my van now still  work.  I know u will be fine.  I know u will miss me.  I know we can do it. Just not now.  I still cry and cry like a kid.  Make my family worry about it.  But i cant stop.  Now i want sleep.  Dreams about u…  About us..  About…  I don’t know  . Maybe my future. 

The first day without you

Da Nang weather : 24 – 28 ºC

Hang Zhou weather : 11 – 22 ºC

This is the first day I live without you, nhung. It is painful. But I should take it. Because the mistake I made.

At the morning, I overslept…I waked up first time at 7 AM by some decorated noise. I sent you my miss, and I realized you blocked me.It is not shocked, right? Because we take a deal last night. I should take this punishment and see how much I love you…

I keep sending your message and keep receiving the block warning.Now you cannot see my miss, but you know it, right?

I know you will see my wechat’s moments, and read this article. I know you love me as I love you, so much. 

Last night, we were afraid to say some bad result, and we tried our best to make the other one calm and believe.We planed our next year, promise we will not do something to make the other one sad or disappointed. And we promise we can wait. Honey, you know? It is so warm. Although you do not call me husband, but I know your love. Although we cannot talk with each other now, but we know we love each other so much.

It is 13:32, we always talk with each other during this time before.After eating lunch, I will go back and call you.Today, I feel so lonely.I spent 20 minutes to eat. I eat as long as I can, because I know after lunch, I cannot talk with you.And I spent 30 minutes to take sunshine, think about somethings, and 30 minutes to walk.

Do you eat something, my darling?Do you feel hot today?Do you want to talk with me?Do you feel better now?I am here.

My love, I will work hard and love you, wait you come back.

The mistake

I made a mistake, at the beginning: I lied to my Nhung. I hide my ex. Because I was afraid Nhung would get angry and leave me.I love Nhung so much, but now she did not trust me anymore.

Yes, everyone will say it is my fault. I admit it. It is a really stupid decision. Now I made Nhung’s heart break and make us break up.

I felt so sad. My mind cannot think about any other things.I cannot see anything.I cannot hear anything.I cannot felt anything.All I know is, I love Nhung so much.If something I can do to repair our relationship, I will do it without thinking anything.

How can I go back China?

I lost my love, it is my all.I lost it.

My life cannot rollback.

I am transferring everything to Nhung, but now, it is going down.I will lose my all.

I hope miracle would happen.

I am in the darkest place.

broken heart

Today i feel so hurt… When i close my eyes,  i climbing in the dark . My tear , my hurt … Who can understand me now ? Who can understand how much i hurt…  No one… 

I only 22.. I think , when i love someone,  just love.. Just want he good to me , dont lie to me.  It enough for me . But no…  No one make me feel that.  

My ex always say he never chat with other girls or lie to me.  I trust him.  And then i know he talking with other girls,  they have baby . Who can feel it make me hurt so much? But i always think it ok.  I think i need to thanks him because i can meet van… I always think that.  One guy can love me because me.  Never lie to me,  make me feel warm,  safe and happy..  But now..  I think i wrong .. I sorry to myself,  make my heart broken… I wrong about trust someone so easy .. I always scared my doubt is right.  I always scared i trust someone and when i know he lie me..  I just want to die … Who can know my feelings now…. Who can…